Thursday, February 4, 2016

DAY IN THE LIFE OF THE INSPECTOR


DAY IN THE LIFE OF THE INSPECTOR:  From a Story Tobe Carey Told to Linda Mary Montano, Adjusted.
 
He was an inspector, the watcher outside the window person.  Yet again his inspectorness was needed because something suspicious came into view.  Oh good,  a mystery to be solved. He loves, loves mysteries.This time it was about two appliance repair trucks;  large, white, with lettering on the sides reading (fill in the blank).  He heard them and saw them from his upstairs studio window.  Hmmmmm,  what are they here for? Certainly not for a service call for us. Everything is working in the house. Must be for (fill in the blank) and (fill in the blank), our neighbors. Thank God I watch out for them and they watch out for us. Hmmmm both their cars are there, but wonder if they are home or out?  Shit, and look, both the workers are still sitting in their trucks with their lights on. What do they need lights for? Are they reading a book? Ordering chocolate covered strawberries for their lover for Valentine's Day? Talking on their phones? Smoking weed? Eating? Coffee? Texting haiku love poems? Taking selfies of their new wedding ring? Changing wet socks? What the fuck!  This is the same company I heard not so good stories about from another friend. They are THE BIGGEST rip off  appliance repair company ever.  They are known to  sit outside in their truck for half an hour, come in a house, do nothing, then present the homeowner with a big bill and leave a note that says they have to come back and REALLY fix what they have found to be an even bigger problem with the appliance. And that equals another bill!! Hmm, I'm going to google the bastards name and find out for sure if it's them, the same company. Yup, here they are and it says they have ziltch/zero ratings and only negative feedback from past customers. And they are in my neighborhood, across from MY house, and going into my friends' house. Hope they are home! Maybe I should call them and warn them about what Google said? Hmmmmm. Let me see if my friends are on speed dial. Oh shit, there goes the fox across the lawn! I hope it doesn't dig under the house and make a nest!  Should I call pest control or the wild animal Conservation Cornell Cooperative office. Honey!!! Are you downstairs and home from playing tennis? Hope so. Guess what???
 

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