ARTIST INTERRUPTUS

ARTUS INTERRUPTUS, LINDA M MONTANO, for panel INTERRUPT/INTERVENE, CALIFORNIA, 2008
STATEMENT 1
It is with great happiness that I sit with you today and intervene in collaboration with this distinguished panel.Let's give a round of applause to Beth Stephens and her significant other and her energetic staff for bringing all 247,000 conference details to successfull fruition. Now to my letter.
Dear Beth. Thanks for iterrupting my daily life routine by inviting me here. I have sat at home this winter, sourrounded by monumental northeast snowdrifts and there I interrupt myself from global warming, democratic debates and my personal anxieties by spending inordinate amounts of time visiting the electronic faces of Montel, Judge Judy, Sylvia Brown,Jerry, Ellen, Dr Phil, Oprah, Caesar Milan,Tyra, Flavor Flav, Katy C, Cathy Lee, Whoopie, Britney, Drew, Jay and Conan, to name a few of my friends. Beth, thank you for interrupting my attention, diverting it from my three addictions to artificial light sources: 1. My computer screen 2. My tv screen 3. The interior light of my refrigerator Beth, you have brought my face into the light of day, my face, once public now has become the new private genital, tabooed by technology.Seen by few. Beth, you have interrupted us and shyly we meet face to Face, in this glorious re-union of pre-robotized, uninterrupted, still alive flesh; flesh fed and learning how to feed. Thanks for caring Beth, Love, Linda P.S. We go home filled with hope and promise to use, as time permits, our new intervention skills with a happy grace.
STATEMENT 2:
Now I ask you to help me, interrupt me.Then I will interrupt you,and the paper I read will interrupt my video. Here's the plan: I need 7 volunteer interruptors and you get certificates stating that you too are a performance artist. What do you do? When I read my paper you will randomly call out your word to determine the accent that I use.They are: 1. FRENCH 2. ALCOHOLIC 3. KARATE 4.CHILD 5.ITALIAN 6.CHICKEN 7.HAPPY The rest of you are also performance artists and you get to perform interruptions with laughter: 1. low laughs, 2.middle laughs,3.high laughs.So when I say 1,2,3,please laugh as long and as hard as you desire.

STATEMENT 3: Resisting and refusing the urge to be theological about the number seven so as not to reference the seven chakras( MULADHARA, SVADHISTANA, MANIPURA, ANAHATA, VISHUDDHA, AJNA, SAHASRARA)or the 7 Hindu bija mantras for the chakras( LUM,VUM,RUM,YUM,HUM,OM,OM) or 7 Catholic sacraments( BAPTISM,COMMUNION,CONFIRMATION,MARRIAGE,CONFESSION, HOLY ORDERS,SACRAMENT OF THE SICK) ;or the 7 aspects of the Kaballah, or 7 color frequencies(RED, ORANGE,YELLOW, GREEN BLUE, PURPLE, WHITE), we, in a spirit of inclusive, non-offensive,non-combative ecumenism could say that the voices come from the 7 glands of the body, a reference universally shared since we all have bodies, just not the same religion. Now, let's intervene..bring your hot, warm, light filled hands to your ovaries/testes, your pancreas, your adrenals, your thymus, your thyroid, your pineal, your pituitary.Thank you, GLANDS OF
THE BODY.

STATEMENT 4:
The paper. Please change the tape. The interruptions now begin.